Monday, December 6, 2010

The First Blog is the Hardest

Ok friends. I'm cleaning up some of my blogs (I have way too many) and am posting a couple from a blog I started to write about marriage called "The First Year is the Hardest". Here's the first post!

Hello and welcome to my blog!

My husband and I have  been together for more than 7 years and have been married for almost 4 years.  We have lived together for most of that time and figured that we would eventually get married.  We knew that the realtionship that we had with each other was different from any other relationship that we had ever been a part of.  There was a deeper connection.  Throughout the first few years of living together, we learned the good and bad things about each other.  We learned about the bad habits and little quirks that you learn through living every day with the person.  Of course, going through this, we though, "If we ever get married, it will be a breeze!" and "They say the first year of marriage is the hardest, we should be fine after living together for a few years."  Of course, we were unaware of the things that change after you get married.

Yes, you're still living together but there's a different emotional level.  There's a sense of a greater responsibility towards that person.  You're now "stuck" with your spouse's family members, whether you like it or not.  Before, even if it wasn't thought about, you did have it in the back of your mind that you can abandon ship.  You can leave or break up or go on to greener pastures.

Of course, the divorce rate is extremely high so apparently, people are still running around, searching for greener pastures and avoiding the feelings of being strapped down but to us, my husband and myself, we take our relationship very seriously.  It is a struggle to look at it as a blessing because the negatives in life always seem to outweigh the positives.

Having said all that, I would like to let all of you know that we were naive.  To all of those people who told you that the first year of marriage is the hardest - I don't believe them.  Marriage - let me rephrase that - a successful marriage requires a daily pledge to love and respect the person that you're with.  Yes, the first year is difficult but the years beyond are difficult as well.  As you go through life, you experience many changes.  Jobs change, which create additional stress and strain on any relationship, let alone marriage; children come (or don't); families struggle (you know, the people who were there before you?) and feelings change.  These are the things that make marriage hard - even after the first year.

In my blog, I'm going to be very frank with you all.  I will present the struggles that we deal with regularly and while I will attempt to keep our deeply personal struggles out, I'm sure that I will tend to include them here.  I hope that we can all learn and grow together through this blog.  I welcome your comments and suggestions and will even answer questions, if you have any.

I hope you all have a wonderful day and I am looking forward to writing to you about all the ins and outs of marriage!

Creative Commons License
I Just Want to Be Ok by Sarah A. Manning is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

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